She connected on Instagram with a guy who lived in another country. Then they decided to meet up

Amanda Boyce stumbled across Sunil Rajput’s Instagram profile by accident.

Sitting in her home in Brisbane, Australia, Amanda was absentmindedly scrolling social media. As she flicked through Instagram stories — one after the other, snapshots of different people’s lives popping up on her phone screen — she suddenly found herself looking at Sunil for the first time.

An account Amanda followed had shared one of Sunil’s posts to their Instagram story. Amanda clicked through and the photo — of Sunil smiling at the camera — enlarged on her phone.

“Wow, he’s good looking,” she thought. Then she scrolled down his page — posts about fitness, travel, his life in India. He seems interesting, Amanda thought.

Without overthinking it, Amanda hit follow.

It was early 2018. Amanda, then 27, was feeling a little disillusioned and unsatisfied with her everyday life in Australia.

“I had gone through some traumatic situations in the years prior, and I was just feeling a bit lost in my life in Brisbane,” Amanda tells CNN Travel today.

“I had a full-time job, but I didn’t have my own home, any kids, no pets. I didn’t really have a purpose, so I found myself just like scrolling Instagram a lot, and then I found Sunil’s page…and really didn’t know what I was expecting, honestly.”

Amanda started liking Sunil’s posts whenever they popped up on her feed. She almost always looked at his stories. She enjoyed seeing snippets of Sunil’s life – flashes of him going out with friends, cooking, working out.

“And then one day, he just randomly messaged me,” she recalls.

Amanda and Sunil started chatting, messaging back and forth on Instagram, introducing themselves, talking a little about their lives.

And then Sunil suggested they chat on the phone. It was early evening in India, a little later into the night in Brisbane, Australia.

Amanda was a little apprehensive at first, but then she figured, if it was awkward, or Sunil wasn’t who he said he was, she’d just hang up.

But as soon as Sunil’s voice answered the call, Amanda felt “really comfortable and safe.”

The two strangers talked for hours, sharing details about their lives, their past relationships, their hopes and dreams.

“It felt really nice to connect and talk to someone so openly about my whole life,” says Amanda.

“But then the next day, I panicked and I thought, ‘I don’t know why I’m investing my time in someone that lives 10,000 kilometers away.’ I felt like I made a mistake about being too open with someone I didn’t really know.”

Amanda felt embarrassed — almost guilty.

“So I kind of ghosted him,” she says. “He kept trying to message and check in with me, but I didn’t really reply.”

A spontaneous trip

Amanda tried to put Sunil out of her mind. But their conversation had sparked an idea. Amanda had always wanted to visit India and a good friend of hers had recently moved there.

“I decided I wanted to book a trip to come to India and meet my friend,” she recalls. “So I booked my flights.”

By coincidence, Amanda’s friend lived in the same city as Sunil — Chandigarh, in northern India.

But Amanda wasn’t going in the hope of bumping into Sunil. Chandigarh’s pretty big, with a population spanning around 1.1 million in 2018.

“I just had this calling to come to India,” says Amanda. “I wanted to do a bit of soul searching. A bit of ‘Eat, Pray, Love,’ if you will.”

Amanda arrived in Chandigarh in the spring of 2018. She started posting Instagram updates — photos of meals out, views, snapshots posing with her friend.

And then she got a message:

“Wait, you’re in my city?” wrote Sunil.

Amanda didn’t reply right away.

“I kind of brushed it off and thought, ‘Oh, I’m not going to have time to meet him. I’m just here to meet friends,’” recalls Amanda.

But then, towards the end of the visit, Amanda’s friend unexpectedly had to head out of town. Suddenly with time to kill, Amanda figured it might be worth contacting Sunil — they’d got on so well on the phone, after all.

Now she was in India, the distance didn’t feel so daunting. And Sunil seemed to have forgiven Amanda for the temporary ghosting.

So Amanda suggested the two of them meet for lunch.

“I wanted to meet in a public place, because I was meeting someone from the internet in a foreign country where I couldn’t speak the language,” she says.

Amanda was also vague about where she was staying — and about the fact her friend was now out of town. She was conscious that Sunil was essentially a stranger.

But as soon as Amanda saw Sunil in person, her fears were calmed.

“I just had this warm, comfortable, safe feeling,” she says. “And it was all a bit exciting as well.”

Sunil’s perspective

In 2018, Sunil Rajput was a twentysomething living in Chandigarh, working in the liquor industry and spending most of his free time in the gym or traveling.

He was single and not consciously looking for a relationship. But when Amanda arrived in his life out of the blue, Sunil was instantly intrigued.

He vividly remembers the first moment her name popped up on his screen, his phone notifying him he had a new follower.

“I thought, ‘Wow, she’s pretty,’” Sunil tells CNN Travel today. “We started texting, and then we had the long conversation on the call. We shared a lot — sensitive conversation, our normal lives, romantic stuff, everything. We really opened up.”

Then, radio silence.

“I was like, ‘What’s happening? She’s not talking to me anymore.’ And then, all of a sudden, I’m seeing her on Instagram in India, and I felt like, ‘Why didn’t she tell me?’”

When Sunil realized Amanda was in his city, he debated whether to get back in touch.

“Should I let my ego down?” he wondered.

Sunil hesitated, but he kept thinking back over their phone conversation. The way they’d connected on such a deep level. It felt like something worth exploring. And he realized that he was “actually looking for love, stability.”

So, Sunil dropped Amanda a message. And when Amanda replied, suggesting meeting up for lunch, Sunil decided he wanted to “do something special for her.”

He suggested that — if Amanda was comfortable — he’d make her lunch at his apartment. Amanda didn’t say no, but suggested they meet in a public space first.

When Sunil saw Amanda in person, he was struck by how surreal the moment was. Externally, he tried to play it cool, but he recalls his heart beating fast as she approached.

“I was talking to this person, never expecting I’d meet her, now she’s standing in front of me,” he says.  “My emotions were all over the place. Deep down, I was crying with happiness that she was here. But I was trying to act low-key.”

Amanda agreed to go to Sunil’s home for lunch, and he was excited to have the opportunity to demonstrate his cooking skills.

“I made Amanda some chicken curry, Indian style,” he says. “We had a nice lunch and spent a good time, we talked a lot.”

“I was really impressed by the effort he went to on our first meet-up/date,” says Amanda. “He picked me up, cooked me lunch, took me to the local temple which is famous in his area and then went out for drinks. He was very respectful and dropped me back to my hotel as soon as I was ready.”

Amanda and Sunil parted that night excited to potentially meet again.

A couple days later, they went out together for a second time.

“We drank, danced a lot, and were really comfortable together,” says Sunil.

For Amanda, it was that evening that made her start to seriously consider, “What is this? Could this be it? What if this is what I’ve been looking for?”

Earlier that year, Amanda’s therapist had encouraged her to write all the traits and qualities she was looking for in a partner on a whiteboard.

In Chandigarh, Amanda kept getting flashbacks to the whiteboard and her list, which included values like family, fitness, food, respect for others, respecting boundaries, and communication.

“Sunil basically ticked all of the qualities,” says Amanda. “It was almost like I’d manifested the whole situation.” 

As for Sunil, he was pretty swept away by Amanda, too.

“I was ready to start something,” he says. “I wanted to see her again. But I didn’t know if it could actually happen. I didn’t know if I’d ever go to Australia or anything.”

Sunil decided to just ensure he and Amanda created “the best memories” while she was in India.

“And I figured if it was meant to be, somehow we’ll meet again,” he says.

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Staying in touch

Amanda returned to Australia, but she and Sunil stayed in touch. More long phone conversations followed, and regular messages back and forth.

“We were talking every day,” Amanda recalls. “And then Sunil said, ‘I want to get to know you a bit better. Do you want to come back to India?’ So I booked flights for June, about two months after my first trip.”

Amanda and Sunil started counting down the days — but when Amanda boarded her flight, the nerves hit and she found herself a little apprehensive.

“I did start to panic a little bit. I thought to myself, ‘What happens if I get there and my feelings have changed?’” recalls Amanda.

“But then I walked out at the airport and saw him standing there. It was summer, 40 degrees (over 100 degrees Fahrenheit) in the middle of Delhi. But Sunil was holding roses and my favorite chocolate, which was melting in the heat. I walked out and saw him and I thought, ‘No, this is the right decision.’”

“It felt really special,” says Sunil of the moment he saw Amanda again, at Indira Gandhi International Airport. “The idea that somebody came all the way from a different country, to see me…”

This time around, Sunil took time off work and “took Amanda everywhere.” He wanted to impress her, win her over, spend as much time with her as he could.

“I took her to mountains, to the Himalayas to go trekking, on road trips, singing songs in the car for her, and karaoke sessions,” he recalls. “It was really memorable. I remember thinking, ‘If this doesn’t work out, I don’t know if I’ll ever put this much effort into something with anybody else.’”

One evening, sitting close to Sunil at a rooftop bar surveying the bustling city below, Amanda told Sunil she wanted to move to India.

“I said I wanted to move in 12 months’ time — that I knew that’s where I wanted to be,” Amanda recalls. “It was a drunken night. But I meant it. We started talking about our future and what we wanted.”

That night, Amanda and Sunil agreed marriage was important to them, that they wanted to start a new chapter of their life together.

“I was really happy,” says Sunil. “But also a little panicked. I was used to living life alone, enjoying my freedom and everything.”

He was also concerned Amanda would change her mind about living in India. But the next day, when the alcohol haze had worn off, Amanda told Sunil she was sincere about what she’d said. And Sunil found himself thinking that “life would be better if she was here all the time.”

He even gave her a ring — it didn’t have to be an engagement ring, he said, if Amanda wasn’t ready yet. But it was a promise.

“A promise that we are always going to be together,” says Sunil today.

This time, when Amanda returned to Australia, she promised she’d return.

And back in Brisbane, Amanda told her friends and her mother she’d met someone, and she was going to move to India to be with him.

There were more than a few raised eyebrows — many of her loved ones worried things had moved too quickly, that Amanda didn’t really know Sunil.

And Amanda was greeted with more concern when, in August 2018, she and Sunil got engaged on vacation in Thailand.

“It was a fairly quick engagement,” admits Amanda. “I did have a few people question if I was making the right choice, if I was rushing into things.”

Amanda understood their concerns, but she and Sunil were confident in their decision-making, and in their commitment to each other. And Sunil offered to speak to Amanda’s mother on the phone, to reassure her and get to know her a little from afar.

“My mom asked him all the different questions — what were his intentions and things like that,” says Amanda. “And afterwards, she felt really comfortable, she was fine.”

“My parents were really worried too,” admits Sunil. “We are really into religion and culture and they questioned, ‘How are you going to do it with a person from a different country, different culture and everything?’”

But Sunil told them he knew Amanda was the right person for him.

“And they trusted me,” Sunil says. “I’ve always been really independent.”

In Thailand, Sunil proposed to Amanda while they were on a night river cruise in Bangkok. Beforehand, he’d worried about how to actually go about it.

“In my culture, we don’t do this sitting on a knee proposing thing,” Sunil explains. “And with the boat, I thought I had to do a romantic, ‘Titanic’ type thing.”

But Sunil put his nerves to one side, and gave Amanda the ring. She said yes. They kissed. Another passenger snapped a few surreptitious photos, which she later passed on to the couple.

“It was an amazing night under the sky and on the water. It was beautiful, and we spent a great time in Thailand,” says Sunil. “We did all the adventurous stuff together. We went to multiple bars and clubs and some days we were chilling next to the beach. Explored markets, shopping and saw so many temples.”

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A new chapter together

Following the engagement, Amanda and Sunil decided they would wait a year before Amanda moved to India permanently.

This was what she’d suggested at the rooftop bar, after all — and it allowed a bit of time for the couple to continue to get to know each other.

“I did have a tendency to make decisions in the moment and not really think,” says Amanda. “So I thought if I move to India after a year, then it’ll give me time to make sure this is exactly what I want.”

In the meantime, Amanda and Sunil navigated a long distance relationship, meeting in person when they could.

“The long distance was really tough,” says Amanda. “Trying to find ways to stay connected that wasn’t repetitive.”

And when they were apart, Sunil often worried Amanda would change her mind.

“It’s a big decision, moving your entire life to a different country,” he says. “I thought she would one day wake up and think, ‘Maybe I won’t.’”

But by the following summer, Amanda was preparing to leave Australia, to relocate permanently. She gave in her notice at the insurance company where she worked.

“I was quitting my job. I had to sell all my belongings. I was leaving my family behind,” she recalls. 

“And then in August 2019, I moved to India, to Chandigarh, to Sunil’s apartment — the one I visited on that first trip when he cooked me lunch.”

“My apartment turned into a proper home,” says Sunil.

The first several weeks together in India were a “honeymoon period,” as Amanda puts it.

“But when I realized that it wasn’t a holiday, that I had moved there, it was harder,” she admits. “Not the relationship, but I couldn’t speak the language, I didn’t have any friends.”

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